Wake Me up When We Meet
by SilentlyRead
Summary: Rory's life is completely upside down, not even Logan can comfort her. Rory needs help but her mysterious dreams are causing her confusion. And what about the mysterious man that keeps lurking about. Post Season 5
1. I will be waiting

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters from the Gilmore Girls; WB and Amy Sherman-Palladino are the creators of the show. I have no affiliation whatsoever withWB.Some parts of my stories refer back and quote from previous Gilmore Girls episodes. The only thing I own is the plot of my story.

Spoilers: My Story takes place after the Season 5 finale "A House Is Not a Home," so I have references from throughout Season 5.

**Wake Me up When We Meet**

Chapter 1: I will be waiting

_She shivered as the sea breeze caressed her porcelain face. As she looked at the man standing in front of her mist enclosed and surrounded their bodies. She desperately tried to seek out his face but all she could see was an outline—a thin shadowy figure. As the mist became a little bit thicker and heavier, drop of salty tears trickled down her crimson cheeks. When the air around her became unbearable she started gasping out for air, but before she started choking a warm body encased her from the cold. His touch provided the warmth, air and security she needed. Her head rested weakly on the solid chest for support. This is where she needed to be. This man was her soul mate, but who was he? _

_As she slowly tilted her head to look at him, the sky started to darken, the rain started to pour and the wind started to tear the destined souls apart. As she felt his grasp weakened she grabbed his hand and pleaded._

_"Please don't let go. Please promise you won't let go!" As she started to drift apart from the man, she heard his voice started to drift also._

_"As long as we keep looking for each other we will remain warm. Eventually you will find me and I will be here waiting."_

_She cried out "How will I recognize you. I can't see your face!" She faintly heard his last words in the distance before they faded away._

_"You will know. You will feel my presence. You will feel it in my touch. You will hear it in my voice. Your heart will sing when it finds my heart. You will know because I will be here waiting."_

_The sky opened up, the thunder roared and the lightning flashed with all its mighty strikes. Her tears matched the pace of the storm. Her body shivered as she felt her waist succumb to the icy cold._


	2. Who am I?

Chapter 2: Who am I?

Rory bolted awake when she felt the cold pressure on her waist. She turned around to see Logan sitting in her bed staring at her with puzzlement.

"Rory what's wrong," Logan asked with concern. When Rory didn't reply he continued "Did I do something wrong?" Rory's blank stare continued. "Did you have a nightmare?" That question did the trick; Rory snapped out of her trance.

Rory wondered. Did I have a nightmare? It was partly comforting and partly terrifying, but why am I still scared. He is cold. Logan is cold. Why is he cold, it is June? How can someone be so cold in June, when it is summer, when it is warm? Rory gently rubbed her arms and discovered that she herself was freezing cold, which scared her more. Why? Where was her warmth?

"I don't know. I feel weird," she answered honestly. "Logan what are you doing here?"

"Well I heard from the Hartford Rumor Mill that you moved in with your Grandparents. I came here to see if there were any truths behind the gossip. When I came here, the maid answered and said 'Miss Gilmore is in the pool house.' So I came over here to the pool house, to find you peacefully sleeping. I thought I could slide on to the bed, lie beside you and hold you, but then you jerked forward from a nightmare."

Rory slowly digested his words as her confusion furthered even farther. Why wouldn't she warm up? Why couldn't she find a little a bit of warmth? Why was Logan cold, not warm? Why didn't Logan's words comfort her?

"I don't think it was a nightmare. Logan I don't think you should be here."

"Rory, why shouldn't I be here?"

"Logan I am confused. I don't know what I am doing anymore. I don't know what I want to be? I don't know who I am. I stole a boat with you, is that who I am. I don't know who I am at all. I don't know anything about myself. I tried reading but nothing comforts me. I haven't talked to my friends, Paris or Lane. I can't stop thinking about how I abandoned my mother, my best friend. Why? Who am I? I can't be around anyone, not even you. I need to sort out my life, Logan."

"Come on, Rory. It's me Logan, your boyfriend."

"Logan I need the time to myself, please leave me."

"Fine, I will let you sort things out, but when you are ready, I will be the first you call right?"

"I don't know Logan, I don't know."

Logan quietly exited through the door without turning back. Rory pulled her sheets around herself and snuggled into the pillow to gain warmth. And to find the warmth she had in her dream, but instead words from the past haunted her.

_I was suffocating, I was cold._

_You wanted to control me_

_You were still a child_

_I stopped being a child the minute the strip turned pink, ok? I had to figure out how to live._

_I thought to myself, what if this was my daughter and she was cold and scared and needed a place to live? What would I want for her? And I thought, I'd want her to find somebody to take her in make her safe help her find her way_

_That's funny. I would've wanted her to find someone who would send her home._

_Yes…and he has things in his life that are hard. His parents, not so great. We have that in common._

_Ever since she got involved with these people, things have been bad. She's up and she's down and she should be stronger than this, I know, but she's young and she's Rory and she's come so far, she's worked so hard. I just don't want her to lose this._

Everyone Rory has ever known has been trying to escape Hartford, yet she seeks out safety in the center of society. Society and Hartford have always been suffocating and cold. She went to the cold; the barriers her mother and countless Chilton friends tried to escape. She felt herself being drawn in—into the center of the iciness.

_The mist became a little bit thicker and heavier, and drops of salty tears trickled down her crimson cheeks. Her body felt shivers as she gave into the cold. She waited for the warmth and love-she waited for the warmth—she waited._


	3. Awakening the Past

Chapter 3: Awakening the Past

The clock glared 2:37 am, yet Rory couldn't sleep; she was restless. No matter what she did she could not bring the back the deep sleep from earlier in the evening. Rory was not in her bed. No, instead Rory was driving around the windy roads of Hartford. She was driving to wherever the roads took her, but somehow she never left the city limits of Hartford. It was like she was trapped in a cage with no way out, a cold cage nevertheless. She made a deal to stop her car once she felt a tiny bit of warmth. She was seeking for some warmth. All she felt was cold. It was cold. Not warm but cold. Only icy cold air.  
All of a sudden she felt the heat rise and her heart jump for a flash of a second; so she stopped the car. She looked up, taking in the surroundings around her. Of all places, she landed at the place she least expected to find warmth. Of all places, this was the one she was happy to leave. Of all places, Rory was at Chilton. 

Chilton. Why Chilton? There was nothing but hate, greed, torture, aggression, competition and jerks, especially jerks. There was no love, maybe occasional lust, but no love. Nobody was friends, except for the sake of friends. But Rory changed that, Rory changed the lives of many of her classmates. Of course she was oblivious to the change she created or the hopes she aspired. Why Chilton?

Rory walked over to the bench in the courtyard and pulled her jacket tighter around her. She felt a little fuse of warmth, which was a start. She just sat there and waited. What she waited for she did not know. All she did was wait.

He drove his car down the street of Chilton quietly, afraid of disturbing the spirits and memories. As he pulled his Porsche into the driveway he noticed another car, a silver car. He looked around with his eyes but saw nobody around. So he started walking softly around Chilton. Then he found her in the courtyard with her back turned, gazing at the stone walls of Chilton. He silently approached her.

Rory shivered from time to time, but after an hour she started feel warmth. Gradually the cold skin of Rory's arms became warmer and warmer. Within a split second Rory felt her head lull forward and her eyes start to blink. She was ready to welcome the sleep that was about to bestow upon her, when she heard a deep husky voice.

"Can't sleep?" he asked. He swiftly slid onto the bench beside her, yet she did not turn.

"Mmm... I am feeling drowsy now" she replied. "I haven't slept well in a long time. I am always too cold to sleep." Even after replying she still did not turn around, but instead closed her eyes.

After awhile the man recognized her as Rory. Rory Gilmore. Why would Rory be at Chilton? Why can't she sleep? He watched her as she closed her eyes and smile a little contently.

"Do you feel a little bit warm now? Because you look like you could fall asleep for one hundred years."

"Oh I am not that warm." She said as she subconsciously scooted closer and started leaning on the man." Without second thoughts she asked, "Do you mind if I rest my head on your shoulder for awhile?"

He became a little worried about Rory but consented anyway. "No, I don't mind, if it helps you." He gently put his arms around Rory giving her time to object.

She snuggled in closer and replied. "Mmm... Thanks." She felt heat slowly spread throughout her body, letting the numbness disappear. Slightly dazed Rory asked, "What are you doing here at Chilton? Could you not sleep?"

"Yes, partly" he stopped and then decided to finish. "Well I came here tonight because my father had a heart attack, it was my duty to come. I tried to sleep but I felt restless and I drove here because every time I need to think I come here. Here to Chilton. I sit and think about all the what-ifs… and regrets. I think about what changed me, what inspired me and what ruined me. Sometimes I need to take a break from the present and thoughts of the future, so I go to the past. The thing about the past is it is always definite it doesn't change. Once something happens it becomes a permanent mark in history."

Rory became enchanted by his words like a baby becomes enchanted by a lullaby. Those words somehow struck a chord in her heart. Her mess became a little bit clearer. She felt safe in the company of the stranger that she refused to look at. She felt compelled to share with him, why she was at Chilton.

"I drove and my mind or my heart, I don't know what but something told me to stop here, so I did. Right now I am afraid to face the future. How did life become so complicated; when I was here at Chilton everything in my future seemed crystal-clear, but now it's hazy and muddy."

All of a sudden Rory felt better like a great weight was lifted off her shoulders. She gently lifted her head and gradually stretched and rotated her arms.

He gazed at her hoping to meet her eyes, but she still refused to look up. He could tell she felt more relaxed and looked better. Rory could feel his eyes upon her, trying to challenge her to look up, but she wasn't ready.

"I hope you feel better. I know I feel better after talking to you I think I should go home now. Maybe I will see you sometime soon." He said softly as he swiftly walked away.

When Rory finally looked up he was gone and she could only see a retreating figure getting into a red Porsche. He felt familiar and safe, and now she wished she had looked at him. She wished she had seen his face, unlike her dream nothing was stopping her from seeing except herself. After looking at her watch she got up and drove back to her grandparents' estate.

When she crawled in her sheets she could still feel the warmth of his arms around her; she could still feel her mystery man. She sat there wondering if it was a dream, but she knew it wasn't. It is funny how the man emotionally resembled the man in her dream. Both remained without identities. The warmth lulled her into a deep slumber where her dreams returned.

"_As long as we keep looking for each other we will remain warm. You will know. You will feel my presence. You will feel it in my touch. You will hear it in my voice. Your heart will sing when it finds my heart. You will know because I will be here waiting. As long as we keep looking for each other we will remain warm." _

_His words repeated in her mind continuously, never missing a beat. Rory did what he said she kept looking for him. Each step kept her warm, each moment she knew she was getting closer. She could feel him. She could feel her anxious heart beat faster with every second. Rory let her mind repeat over and over again his words—"I will be here waiting."_


	4. Whirlwinds

Chapter 4: Whirlwinds

As Rory looked in the mirror, she smiled. She had the best sleep than she had in the past couple of weeks. Although with daybreak the warmth she had experienced from last night slowly slipped away, but some remained. Rory slowly put one of her Grandmother's antique combs in her hair. She fastened a loose bun with loose tendrils. Rory gazed at the complete product in the mirror, she herself could even say she looked somewhat pretty.

Rory had loved the dress she chose to wear; only a week before Yale let out Rory and her mom, Lorelai picked out the dress for her Grandparents function. Rory was somewhat afraid of tonight because it was a Yale alumni party in honoring of the year's finish. Since Rory was staying with her Grandparents it was only fitting that she attended the party. Again Rory gazed at her dress, a reddish, almost maroon dress with a fitted bodice and a flared skirt. The dress complimented Rory's curves and milky colored skin.

Rory was stirred out of her reverie when she heard a slight rap at her bedroom door.

"Rory the guests will be arriving soon. Your Grandfather and I want you to be with us when we greet them. Okay darling?"

"Yes Grandma, I will be down in a second. I will finish getting ready really quick. I am not quite done yet." Rory grimaced when she realized she said quite; she remembered the last time when she came home from golfing with her grandfather that she said quite, her mom ragged and teased her about it for days. Rory finished putting on the tiny bit of make-up that she needed and headed for the stairs.

After two hours guests were still streaming in the Gilmore Estate and Rory's Grandparents dismissed Rory from the welcoming committee telling her to go mingle with the guests. So Rory walked to a seat in the corner and observed the people there. Every person there was dressed in black, white, grey, brown or navy. All the colors seemed dull, emotionless and cold. Where was the life? Where was the color? Rory felt like an outsider in her bold wine hue. She was the only one living. She felt herself getting colder as more people came in. Every single handshake was cold. Every pair of eyes was cold. All words were spoken out of distance and courtesy. With every passing minute she watched the whirlwinds of sad, cold people dancing in the ballroom she became colder.

All of a sudden she felt a heat searing through her body. Why? Immediately she felt someone's gaze upon her. She looked around but all she saw were swirls of grey dancing around her. One such heat cannot come from someone in grey.

Across the room a man in a vibrant blue suit was staring intently at Rory. Boy was her appearance breathtaking. No angel could live up to her natural beauty. He could see her struggling with the freezing personalities, wrapped up in their own worlds, surrounding her. But as his gaze intensified he saw her relax, but she was looking for something or someone. Who was she looking for? Did she feel his stare?

Just as Rory was about to find the direction of the gaze, Logan came over. Logan saddled up to Rory's side and put his arm around her waist carelessly and kissed her cheek. Rory both glared and stared at him with shock before she nudged him away.

"Logan what are you doing here? I told you to leave me alone."

"Rory what was I supposed to do? Your Grandparents invited me and then yesterday they doubled check to see if I was coming. I couldn't say no that would be rude. I mean I am your boyfriend and I attend Yale, it's only fitting that I came to the party. I thought you wanted to see me, when Emily told me that you were in the ballroom."

"Logan you could have politely declined or avoided me here at the party. You disrespected my wishes. Please leave me alone."

Logan noticed Rory's eyes glancing around the room, looking. Logan was not ready to give up on Rory. Logan really wanted to help, so he whispered in her ears what he thought she wanted to hear and what he believed.

"I think you made the right decision to take a break from Yale. I think it's great you want to reevaluate your life. My family and I support all your decisions."

Rory snapped. This wasn't the reaction Logan thought he would receive, he didn't know what to say, but he knew he couldn't surrender yet. He had to try just a little harder. Rory started walking away still looking.

"Rory please dance with me," Logan pleaded desperately.

"No leave me alone Logan." All of sudden Logan noticed a pair of blue eyes staring, no, taking in Rory Gilmore. This was Logan's cue to walk away, but he promised himself once he had his little "chat" that he would come back to Rory.

Logan sauntered to his destination and walked right in front of the man's face, preventing his view of Rory.

"What are you doing here? Nobody wants you here or your company."

The man smirked "well to the contrary Logan, it seems that the Gilmores requested my presence here."

"You're not a Yale alumnus nor do you attend Yale, so I think you should leave."

The man said mockingly as he put his hand over his heart "Logan have you forgotten my father was a Yale alumnus. You of all people should know that my father attended Yale; you know since our fathers were such good friends before they started feuding. So I am here to fill his position and pay respects to Gilmores since my father is unable to attend being bed-ridden and all."

"You don't give crap about your father. You always said he was the worst role model ever and that you never wanted to be him isn't that why you never came back."

"Unlike you, I understand that blood is thicker than water. I respect that he is my father and I will never have another father. Sometimes you have to honor and respect your family whether you get along or not. You wouldn't understand because the Huntzbergers never been an honest lot."

"Fine, you're here and you paid your respects now you can leave. You have no reason to stay."

The man's eyes wandered over to Rory where he watched her fondly. "Oh but I believe I want to stay you know it is fun party and all."

Logan saw where his gaze was directed and looked over at Rory, where Rory looked up and saw Logan. Logan smiled, but Rory did not.

When Rory saw Logan smile she realized she had to get away. Logan's smile just made her feel colder. Rory's fear of becoming cold again increased when she felt the gaze that had been keeping her warm was being blocked. Rory started to gasp for air, but the room was to cold for her to breathe. She kept getting crushed by couples in grey, black, white, brown, and navy, no to her they were whirlwinds of empty emotions. Rory felt like she was suffocating. She had to get out. She couldn't stay here. She couldn't stay in this house at all. She had to get out, but she couldn't take her car because Logan might find her. The last thing she wanted was Logan to find her car parked or driving, Rory knew he would follow. Rory turned around to leave at the same time Logan turned around to face the man again.

"Rory's mine, stay away!" Logan yelled a little flustered.

The man's smirk slowly faded as he replied "Right so you and your family can break her heart, spirit and dreams so she can be what you guys want. She is nothing but a possession with a good name to your family. You brought her back to the place that her mother so desperately tried to shield her from."

"You know nothing about Rory!" Logan said furiously.

The man continued with a grave expression, "And you do?"

Logan nodded vigorously "Of course I do, she _is_ my girlfriend."

"Then where is she?" Logan took that as indication to turn around only to discover Rory was gone. When he turned around the man was gone, Logan was left with the swishing colorless whirlwinds.

* * *

A/N: I just want to say thank you for your support, especially since I was a little reluctant to post since this is my first fan fiction. I hope you guys are enjoying my story and do not worry Rory will find out who her mystery man is soon and so will you. 


	5. Sweet Dreams

Chapter 5: Sweet Dreams

Rory stood outside her grandparents' estate staring at the street. Her car was not an option. If she walks she can't get very far, Logan was smart he would notice she was gone after awhile. What could she do? Where could she go? Rory saw a bus headed for the bus stop down the corner. So Rory ran to the bus, the same bus she took to Chilton during high school. Rory knew where she was going, she was going to Chilton. Yes, Chilton, she felt tremendously better after she went to Chilton last night.

Rory boarded the bus and headed to the back. She stared out the window as the trees pass by, soon becoming a blur. She pondered while she was sitting. Why was she being so distant with Logan? Logan was a good boyfriend he cares and lately has been concerned. She remembered the worried look he had on his face when he thought he was going to lose her. She wished she could help him feel better, she knew nobody should be dismissed the way she ignored Logan. She knew he wants to secure his future with Rory and she was sorry she couldn't reassure him. Her heart wouldn't let her make promises that she couldn't guarantee. He still had a chance.

Once the man got away from Logan, he got into his car. Where would Rory go? He wasn't exactly sure since as Logan put it "You know nothing about Rory!" Then an idea came to him like lightning from the sky. Where was she last night? At Chilton, so that is where he decided to go. As he pulled up to the front of Chilton he saw Rory emerge from the bus stop.

The bus ride has been soothing, Rory had become somewhat relaxed. Once Rory stepped off the step she heard a car nearby. Rory started to panic, could Logan really find her that fast. Her heart became a pulsating mustang racing down a track. Rory glanced up and she noticed it was a red Porsche, not a black Hummer. Logan lost Rory, when she sighed with relief. Rory walked passed the car to the courtyard. After a couple of minutes she heard soft footsteps follow.

He sat down the same way he did the night before and again Rory refused to look at him. They sat in the silence comfortably before a husky voice broke it.

"Couldn't stand the party?"

"I felt like I was suffocating. You were the person staring at me the whole night, right?" she asked quietly.

"Yes," he replied faintly to match her tone. "Why are you here? Rory what's got you so messed up?" When she didn't reply he continued "Wait I know what, it's Hartford. There is no place like Hartford; this is the only place that knows how to ruin a person or break a spirit. Why did you come back here? You know so many people who tried to escape?"

After a couple minutes Rory took a deep breath, and let tears slide as she told the man beside her everything that happened.

"I went to Yale hoping to major in journalism. After the second year I met Logan, I thought he was rude and conceited. I wanted to stay away from him, but soon I found myself falling for him. We dated and I wanted to continue, but he didn't want a relationship. I compromised myself and my beliefs by agreeing to casual dating. After awhile I became unsatisfied so I told him to break it off, but he thought it was an ultimatum. When he agreed to being my boyfriend I should have known something was wrong, but I was happy. I was happy he wanted to be with me and only me, I mean he could have any girl he chooses but he chose me. I was happy until I had dinner with his family, I wasn't good enough, and I wasn't what they wanted for their son. They wanted a trophy wife. It hurt I felt awful, but then his dad offered an internship and he wouldn't take no for an answer so I agreed. I thought I was doing well at the newspaper office, but Mitchum Huntzberger told me otherwise; he knew what he was talking about… I mean he has been in the newspaper business for years, he has that gut feeling. I was crushed, I had always wanted to be a journalist my whole life. I don't know what happened next except for the fact I stole a boat and abandoned my mother. I am sorry for rambling and complaining, but I don't know who I am anymore. I don't know anything, everything is unclear now."

The man sat in shock reeling in everything she has just said. He never expected for her to pour her heart out. Rory didn't think of anything about her outburst—she was the drunk and the man was the bartender.

"Rory all I can say is sorry, but as Nick Carraway says 'They're a rotten crowd… You're worth the whole damn bunch put together.'" He believed what he said and felt compelled to continue. "They don't care a thing about individually or what makes a person unique. It's all about money and fame to them. You can't allow yourself fall victim to their cruel and cold behavior. You have to understand that the Huntzbergers and the rest don't care who they change. If the change is better for them, then power to them. They're all self-centered they don't think outside of themselves. They're colorless and bland people, but you, _you_ are full of life. I've seen your passion for books, coffee and people. You're not them; you don't fit in with their crowd because you are _better_ than _them_."

Rory felt a small smile tug on her lips. "Thanks for your words, but I can't do anything yet. I have no place to go and my life hasn't cleared up yet."

"Rory if you continue to stay here, you will just keep getting colder until you become one of them. I can't let that happen."

"It's temporary it's what I have to do."

The man nodded, he understood the feeling of doing something because it was an only option. He felt his heart leap with desire, compassion and hope. He felt it was his destiny to make sure Rory remained full of life. Rory was the one who brought joy, life and color to Chilton; she changed so many lives, so maybe it was his turn to guide her.

Rory leaned into him for the second night without looking at him. She felt his arms go around her waist, protecting her from the cold.

Rory asked "Do you mind if I lean on you again and we sit in silence?"

His simple reply was "As you wish."

She knew she should look at him, but she couldn't. She knew if she looked at him, then she would have to think about the future and she wanted to stay in the _past_. The future was too uncertain for her. For someone who has been so strong her whole life, she was feeling weak, but in his arms she felt the support she needed. Ever so softly Rory cried as he gently patted her head. His stroke was full of emotions—love and distress. They sat together for long time, with Rory in the comfort of his arms.

After awhile the man felt the need to ask her one small request. "Rory, will you please look at me."

"I am not ready. I can't explain but I can't look at you. Some part of me wants you to remain a mystery—without an identity. I can't explain. I think I should go and maybe you should also."

"Are you sure Rory? Are you okay" He saw her nod while she faced the wall. He knew he had to let her be. "I guess I will be seeing you around later," he said as he started to walk away.

But nothing could stop him from hearing her soft and tender words. "I hope it's soon."

He felt his heart soar and he realized, how much she wanted to know who he was, but she need a little push. So he replied with the only fitting words he could think of. "Sweet dreams. Sweet dreams Mary."

With that he walked away to his Porsche and disappeared into the distance. He left Rory smiling because she knew he understood her.


	6. Smell the Roses

Chapter 6: Smell the Roses

On the bus ride home, Rory's mind tried to recall Tristin Dugray as she remembered him last, but the deep husky voice didn't fit the image of a teenage playboy. The voice was haggard with age, pain and possibly love. She vowed to herself the next time she was at Chilton, she would look. Rory knew there would be a next time—she could feel it in her bones. She wanted to ask him everything—what was North Carolina like? Why didn't he ever return to Hartford? She wanted to know why his name was only whispered nowadays? She wanted to tell Tristin that she missed him. Yes Rory _missed_ Tristin; she knew deep down that Tristin and her were friends in their own unique way. Rory knew that nobody outside his family, except her knew about North Carolina.

Maybe that's why Rory wasn't afraid to have another encounter with him again. She wanted to confide in him, like he did with her. She always respected the fact that he shared the truth with her—and it made her miss him even more.

Rory stepped off the bus and slipped quietly past her grandparent's estate into the pool house. To Rory's surprise, once she got into her room she wasn't alone. There on her bed waiting for her was Logan. Rory could tell he looked very distressed and she wanted to soothe his worries, but she couldn't. It dawned on Rory that she didn't want to be around Logan anymore. She changed him, and he changed her. Rory wasn't happy with her changes. She found herself wishing she never became involved with Logan, then she could at least be ignorant and happy doing the one thing she loved—writing.

She kept wondering why did she fall for Logan? Why did she give him a chance? And then it hit her like falling bricks. Logan was a wilder and college version of Tristin. Did Rory regret never giving Tristin another chance? Did she regret saying "I hate him" to Dean? Yes. Rory had always wondered what would happen if she and Tristin remained friends. Would Tristin have still been sent away? She guessed no. Would Paris still have forgiven her? Rory thought eventually. When Rory accepted Logan, a part of her heart thought she was giving Tristin a second chance. Her heart thought Logan could make up for what happened with Tristin. Her heart was wrong, Logan is not Tristin.

Rory's heart weakened as she stared at Logan. Looking him straight in the eyes—brown eyes not blue. Rory knew she had to tell Logan, she couldn't just let him trail after her. She had to let him know they couldn't be together. She had to tell him. Before Rory said anything she let their eyes remain locked as she advanced forward.

Rory stopped about a foot away from Logan and her bed. Logan stared at Rory quizzically. Logan was afraid of losing Rory, yet he knew that he was going to, but he knew he wouldn't lose her without a fight. Logan _wanted _Rory. He _needed_ her. Logan could feel all of his emotions welling up inside—mostly fear. He desperately wished Rory would come closer. He felt the need to pull her into his arms and wrap his arms around her so tight that she couldn't disappear.

Tenderly, Rory whispered, "Logan." Rory wished she could offer him her hand for comfort, but she knew that would be dangerous. Unfortunately for Rory, Logan misunderstood her voice and thought he had hope. So Logan swiftly pulled Rory forward and caressed her cheek before he dipped his head forward for sweet kiss.

Rory was shattered to reality when she tasted something bitter—tears—on her lips. Neither of them knew whose tears they felt, and neither of them cared. It was then Logan looked into Rory's eyes and knew that it was over. It ended with a bittersweet kiss. They both felt the ending, no words were needed, but words were said.

"I am so sorry Logan, I am sorry." Rory tried to comfort Logan with more words, but with each word Logan became more pained. "Logan I want you to know you mean a lot to me, and our relationship meant a lot. I don't regret anything about our friendship or relationship, but this—this not me. I wouldn't change the times we spent together for anything in the world. I mean you taught me so many things that I never thought I had inside of me. I don't think I would have ever jumped many stories high with just an umbrella if it weren't for you. You made me courageous, you made me live my life, but I also became a person I didn't want to be."

Rory took a moment to catch her breath before she continued. But before she could start again Logan shushed softly. Rory looked at Logan hoping to see any emotions in his face, but nothing gave anything away. His eyes didn't give away any emotions—his brown eyes gave nothing away.

"Rory if I couldn't let you go when you tried to end our relationship the first time, I won't—I can't give you up this time. I never thought in a million years I would have a steady girlfriend, but I changed myself for you. I wanted—I want you. Nothing can stop me from _wanting_ you. I may leave now, but I won't let go; I will keep trying to fight for you Ace," Logan cried hoarsely as he masked his pain.

How can someone so passionate and desperate show no emotions whatsoever? Rory wanted to know, she knew Logan cared. She also knew Logan's pride would never let anyone see what he was feeling.

"I know Logan. I know, but you have to let go," Rory pleaded gently.

As Logan got up and advanced toward the door, he said "I won't give up and I won't let go. Tonight when you disappeared I looked everywhere and I looked outside and I saw your car. I didn't know where you went or where you would go. I thought to myself I guess I don't know you." Logan softly chuckled as he continued, "I guess Dugray was right, I really don't know you. But I plan to make it my goal to figure you out. I promise Ace there's nothing I won't do to show you how I feel."

With that he left the room and closed the door. Rory let her tears trickle down her face one by one. She knew she hurt Logan deeply and she knew he wasn't going to give up, but she wished he would let go. Rory was afraid Logan's persistence was only going to increase the sorrow between them. Rory let her emotions wash over her, she cried for everything—Logan, her mom, her friends, Yale, Stars Hollow, and her dreams. She even cried for her past loves—Dean and Jess. Rory's life wasn't going the way she and her mom planned it.

Rory thought about her relationship with Logan, nobody liked him. Her mom, Paris and even Marty all warned her about Logan, but she couldn't help it. She got caught up in his lazy smirk and oozing confidence. She thought Logan was the way to reconcile with the past, but instead it changed her future not her past. Rory should have known better—she should have known. The past cannot change, it never has and it never will. Rory continue to cry herself to sleep.

As Rory drifted off into a peaceful slumber Rory's mind registered part of Logan's final words that she didn't pay attention to earlier: _Dugray was right._ Rory's mind screamed how did Logan know Tristin? And since how long? Rory wanted the answers, but her body was fighting to pull her to sleep. Finally Rory surrendered herself into a deep sleep.

_The mist once again surrounded her, but this time when she looked down she noticed a deep amber path. So she followed the path until it came to a dead end. When she looked up the fog started to disperse and the sun started to shine. She got a perfect view of where she was. It was Chilton._

_"Why am I here?" she asked with amazement. She didn't expect an answer, but she got one. She became warmer as his soothing voice drifted toward her ears._

_"Sometimes the past holds the answers you need for the future." _

_With his words she spun around to see him, but he had disappeared. She felt disappointment, but as she started to walk away she heard muffled voices from a heated argument. She found herself being dragged into Chilton by her curiosity. She found herself outside the Franklin classroom. She peaked inside and to her surprise she saw her 16-year-oldself arguing with a 16 year-old Paris._

_What furthered her confusion is the argument between the two was one that she never had. She only understood and caught the tail of the argument, which was Paris screaming, "Wake up and smell the roses Rory!"_

With Paris' words Rory bolted awake. As the sun filtered in her room Rory decided what she needed to do. Rory needed to talk to Paris—Paris was one of her best friends and she could help Rory through the next step. Paris was Rory's appetizer before she had her meal—her Mom and her dessert—her life and dreams.

Rory picked up the phone off its cradle and dialed Paris' number. As the phone rang Rory started to wonder what if Paris is not around what will I do? Rory felt a hot stream of tears start pouring down her face as the phone continued to ring. All of a sudden there was an answer.

"Whoever this is—this better be important. It's only ten in the morning," Paris barked into the phone.

"Paris," Rory try to say as she became wracked with sobs. As Rory gasped for air she softly cried, "can you come over I need to talk and I need help."

Paris' heart softened at Rory's weeping voice. Paris sometimes was afraid to admit it, but she considered Rory her best friend. Paris couldn't stand to see or hear Rory in pain so she quickly asked, "Where are you?"

* * *

A/N: I am sorry that it took a long time to update, but I have been somewhat busy. I also wanted to give you the perfect chapter. I rewrote this chapter many times until this idea came to me and I knew it was perfect. I just want to say I am Rogan friendly. And although Logan can be cocky I do believe that he really does care for Rory. I also want to note that Logan is far from disappearing from my story—him and the rest of the Huntzbergers will definitely be mentioned. And I do not plan to make Logan the bad guy at all; Logan may have commitment issues but I don't think he would do anything to deliberately hurt Rory. Logan's dad and family is a different story—I do believe they would intentionally hurt or change Rory. Actually I believe that Mitchum lied to Rory, hoping she would become a trophy wife, but that might be just me. I will try to get the next update up sooner this time. 

-Notify me of any spelling or grammar mistakes, please. Constructive criticism welcomed!


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